Monthly Archives: April 2011

Last night I had a dream.

More of a nightmare really; I dreamed that I answered my front door, only to find a bloke wearing a fake tan, a blue rosette and a plastic surgery smile that wouldn’t look out of place on an American home shopping ad, standing on my front porch.

Being the suave urbane sophisticate that I am, I should have asked the canvasser if he liked sex and travel (“then f*ck off!”). But the subconscious being what it is, I was forced to endure a 10-minute national party infomercial, starring John Key, along with an assorted supporting cast of the usual players, Muppets one and all.

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